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Sithrah #7 – You Got Your Parachute On, Baby?

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This will be the second to last post that I construct in this long vertical format. :(

It was fun while it lasted but the time has come to start focusing on the book layout instead of just the website. So pretty soon you will start seeing updates here more often with pages or panels that are taken directly from the book layout. This might just help me get this webcomic on an update schedule too finally. Who knows, it might be twice a week if I can get my stuff together. Haha. See you soon!

Come See Me at Phoenix Comicon Next Week!

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Hi all! I just wanted to let you know I’ll be exhibiting at Phoenix Comicon on June 5-8, 2014. I have lots of freebies as usual including posters of reMIND and Sithrah. I’m in booth 446 and listed under “Jason Brubaker” this year. I’ll also be on all three Kickstarter panels this year. Here’s a little map of where you can find me. Hopefully I’ll see you there!

Jason

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How to Feel Alone

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Something strange happened when I was working on reMIND. I always had a smile and always talked about positive things to my audience but as I was getting millions of page views and loads of fan support, I personally felt…  alone.

The bigger reMIND got the more I was concerned that someone would find out something about me that they didn’t like and it would all come crashing down. So I subconsciously devised a plan (quite early in fact) to hide everything that people might not like about me. As an example, I knew I had many atheist fans of reMIND and I worried that if I said anything about God they would all run away and never come back.

This whole idea that one needs to hide things from people in order to feel loved by them is pretty mainstream from what I can tell. But the thing is, it’s totally false. In fact I now believe, to NOT feel alone, I need to let people know who I REALLY AM whether I’m afraid they will disown me or not. The more secrets I would hide from people, and loved ones, the more worried I got about being found out. If found out, I worried I wouldn’t be loved anymore which ended up making me feel even more isolated and alone. How pathetic! Am I the only one here?

On the other hand, if I am honest with people and they still choose to hang out with me then it’s not because of some mask I’m wearing to make them comfortable. They are hanging out with me because they choose to do so even after knowing the real me. I also experienced this with close friends and especially in my marriage. I have a loving wife who supported what I was doing but even so, I felt alone. This was my big lesson in 2013.

I don’t know the full extent of what my audience thinks about me talking about my faith on this blog but you know what? I don’t feel alone anymore. Even though I know many of my readers don’t agree with me, I have gotten wonderful emails from longtime fans who support and love what I’m doing. And remember me worrying about what my atheist fans would do if they knew I was a Christian? Well, let me just highlight a super encouraging comment by R:

I’m really interested in seeing where this comic goes, knowing that it’s so faith-based. I’m an atheist, I always have been and it’s always been really important to me, and I’ve been trying not to be afraid of letting that shine through in my stories as well. To me it’s not a matter of trying to persuade other people or work some agenda as much as express how I see the world, and it sounds like Sithrah is the same kind of thing? I really hope so. Either way, thanks for being brave enough to discuss your faith in a shameless way, I really look forward to seeing things from your perspective through the storytelling.

Good luck!

Whoever you are, R, Thank you!

I think R has brought up an interesting subject that I’d love to dive into in my next post. Until then, what are you hiding and is it making you feel alone even though you’re surrounded by people?

Come see me in Seattle!

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I’m going to be at ECCC on March 28-30th at booth 802. Come by and say hi and grab a free poster of reMIND and Sithrah! I will have copies of Unnatural Talent, reMIND Vol.1 and Vol.2 as well as some collectors boxsets. T-shirts, prints, postcards, original art from my books and some old dumb comic too. :) Hopefully I will see you there!

eccc-3

Making A Living With Your Webcomics Panel this Weekend!

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Hi Ya’ll. This weekend (Saturday) I will be on a panel to discuss making money with webcomics at Gallery Nucleus. At this point it will be Ethan Nicolle of Axe Cop and myself and we are trying to lock in the third guest still. It is a $80 cover charge and lasts from 1PM to 5PM. Plus, both Ethan and I have each agreed to give away a free signed book to anyone who buys a ticket. :)

There will be a free signing for the public after the panel is finished too.

Here is the details: http://www.gallerynucleus.com/event/419

Please help us spread the word! Hopefully I will see you there.

Jason

The Spiritual Journey: Just Go!

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Where Do I Go Now?

This is the question I keep asking myself about this blog. Where do I go now? In the last post I said that I wanted to talk about God and the spiritual journey from now on because that was the subject that was interesting to me. Since then I’ve been wondering how to do this. I’ve gotten lots of emails from people encouraging me to keep going but I just don’t know where to start. Plus I usually like to avoid controversy. Then this morning, I was praying about it and I kept hearing this one short sentence in my mind saying, “Just go.” It kept repeating in my head and it made me think of all the times that Jesus said to just go.

“Now go, and remember that I am sending you out as lambs among wolves.” Luke 10:3

It became more and more clear that I didn’t need to know where I should go, just that I should start going. It’s funny but I used to give this same advice to people asking me how to start a graphic novel. My answer was always to just start it already.

It seems in life like I am always called to “step out on faith” and allow God to work. It’s only in hindsight that I can look back and say “Wow, that was a pretty good move!” but in the moment it always seemed like a big risk. Even stupid at times to everyone around me.

This has always been a great challenge for me as I have pursued a creative path in life. You see, there are lots of voices in our heads telling us what we want to hear. Almost all of these voices are completely selfish and destructive, leaving a wake of carnage behind anyone who listens. Oh, but they are so seductive aren’t they? Just look at television commercials and you will see an industry built around feeding these seductive voices in our heads telling us what we need and what we should be like and look like. “It’s okay to want EVERYTHING!” they say. “You deserve it.” But what these seductive voices fail to mention is if we listen to them, we are only being lead to want more. And soon we are in chains to their every command. All because we listened to these self-focused voices in our heads.

Okay, I’m getting off track here. My point is, I want to listen to the right voices with my art and life.

This may sound like a bunch of hocus pocus if you aren’t a Christian but we believe that the Spirit of God works in those who believe what Jesus said. This Holy Spirit, as we call it, leads us if we allow it. The thing is, it’s always about stepping out on faith. To just go. Honestly, I did the same thing when I started reMIND. I can plan all I want, but at the end of the day my secret weapon is that I just try to listen and follow where the Holy Spirit is leading me and I try to ignore all the other opinions.

So, I am just going. This blog post is me stepping out on faith. reMIND was me taking a step. Starting Sithrah was another step.

In other words, I understand what I’m getting into. I know talking about subjects like religion, faith, God and Jesus are going to cause controversy and a full range of emotions from people. I get that. And quite honestly, with all the hostility on the internet, I feel like I’m going to be one of those “lambs among wolves” that Jesus was talking about. But what’s the point of all this if we believe in something and can never talk about it?